The Bigotry of Attraction: Dicks are Clits, Too


Guenever is woke even when Zer is asleep. Resident expert in LGBTQAIF rights. Gender queer badass- fighting the Fash.

Serious Problem in the Dating World

Today, I am going to discuss a serious problem in the dating world– the bigotry of attraction. Transphobia runs rampant in the world of Tindr, OkCupid, and the like. So how do we stop it? GET. WOKE.

It seems like I’m constantly reading “hilarious” (read: horrible and discriminatory) stories on the internet from people who “got fooled” by a trans person.

My first memory of encountering stories like this involves shaking with rage to the song “Funky Cold Medina.”

So I took her to my crib, and everything went well as planned
But when she got undressed, it was a big old mess, Sheena was a man
So I threw him out, I don’t fool around with no Oscar Meyer wiener
You must be sure that the girl is pure for the Funky Cold Medina

There are some non-woke people in this world who would read such dispicable lyrical storytelling and think that it’s funny. But these disgusting lyrics completely strip away the humanity of poor Sheena– she wanted to make a love connection with a heterosexual male, and was unjustly thrown out because of the simple fact that her very large clit, to the un-woke, looks like a penis.

If you are still reading and have decided that you don’t want to murder the souls of trans people by rejecting them for transphobic reasons, read on! I am going to tell you how to rid yourself of the transphobia buried in your physical attractions.

Forget everything you thought you knew about Male and Female Anatomy:

To be properly woke, you need to learn a few things.  First, “Gender” is like a vast blizzard of snowflakes. Every one is beautiful, crystalline, unique, and fragile– to doubt its individuality is to allow it to melt in your hand. And you know the rocks taht sometimes end up inside snowballs? Those are the cis white males of the world, trying to keep everything rigid.

Next, you need a new anatomy lesson. A long piece of flesh hanging from someone’s pelvis, closely flanked by two orbs, might be a penis and testicles– or, it could be a very large and beautiful clitoris, with two delicate and unusually shaped labia.

The hairy anus behind the clitoris / penis MIGHT be a butthole — or, it could be a beautiful and pristine vagina.

Hopefully you are starting to see my point. From here I will allow you to educate yourselves, for the list of what different pieces of anatomy COULD be is literally endless. This is where the next piece of advice I have becomes essential.

Take People You Want to Have Sex With at their Word, 100%

If you want to be truly woke, you must take people you want to have sex with at their word. No room for doubt or questioning.

Let’s say you’re a cisgendered male who desires to be woke. If you go on a date with a 6’5” person with broad shoulders, a deep voice, and a beard, but that person tells you they are a woman? You’d better tell them what a beautiful woman they are. Instill that person with confidence in their chosen identity. If you are fortunate enough to have sex with her, jerk off that beautiful clit with vigor and tell her how much your penis enjoys her tight pussy (which also happens to sometimes pass feces). You aren’t gay– you’re woke.

It is your duty as a decent human being to look into the hearts of people you want to be with, and take them at their word as to what is in their pants. And if you would judge someone by how big their clitoris happens to be, or how bouncy their pectorals are, then you




Top 5 Suicide Cliffs

It can be hard to find just the right place to kill yourself. The location must have a combination of factors rendering it the perfect place to end your miserable life. I’m going to share a few of my best ideas.

Wednesday Night Live With @HarperTheFox

An episode of Wednesday Night Live, hosted by the brilliant and beautiful @HarperTheFox. She definitely didn’t write this post excerpt, despite the fact that she is a brilliant writer and unicorn of a human being.


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