Next Beauty Trend: Look Like You Have Ebola!


Former opera singer. A very classy lady of culture, and your guide to all things beauty.

Epidemic Trend-Setting

I recently learned that in Victorian times, an extremely popular beauty trend was to mimmick the symptoms of Tuberculosis– one of the most terrible and deadly diseases of the time.

Upon looking into my crystal ball of fashion, I have realized that a resurgance of such a trend is imminent! Get on top of it now, and look like an incredible trend-setter — the time has come to make it look like you have Ebola.

Redden the Whites of Your Eyes:

People with Ebola have a lot of redness in the whites of their eyes. This may be difficult to achieve, but to be a true trend-setter, it is worth it. If dehydrating yourself doesn’t work, I have a couple of recommendations.

If you are allergic to cats, find the nearest feline and rub it on your face. This will surely give you the desired look.

If you are not allergic to cats, this tip is sure to succeed — find a pile of dirt or sand, and throw it into your own face repeatedly. Your eyes will try to blink to keep out the irritants, but if you are persistant, SOME will surely get in. You’ll have sex red eyeballs in no time.

Mimick the Look of a Terrible Hemorrhage

People with severe Ebola will experience blood hemorrhages from any and every orifice. It is your job to play with that concept with your makeup! Take a deep red lip-liner, and go to town. Experiment! Line your eyes with red. Extend red lines coming out of your ears, and running down your neck! Really have fun with this. It doesn’t have to look truly gory– simply evocative of terrible pathogen.

Look as Pale as Possible

A sickly and dehydrated person will surely be pale. Avoid the sunlight at all costs! If you already have a ghastly tan, try rubbing your skin with baby powder. The white and dusty appearance will amplify your diseased appearance.

And Those are the keys to the rapidly-approaching beauty trend of mimicking ebola!

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